I don’t know about you, but I thought this last winter was long and it felt like we had to wait a long time for spring to finally arrive. I did my best to busy myself with all the activities I could do outside in the snow yet longed for spring to arrive. The transition from winter to spring required patience as we did not have any control over when the season would change. This waiting has been termed the liminal space, the space when we are in transition. These transitions can be voluntary, such as taking a new job or getting married. It also can be the result of something unforeseen or unplanned, such as losing a job or a divorce. The waiting in these harder experiences requires some of the greatest patience and fortitude. For many, this waiting is experienced in isolation, which, I think, makes it much more difficult.
Recently, a family member was diagnosed with cancer that required radiation treatment. The liminal space had multiple phases of waiting, such as waiting for: the test results, the time for treatment to begin, the time required for treatment to conclude, the time to see if the treatment worked. The stress was incredible.
When we find ourselves in a liminal space consider the following choices:
- Taking steps to share this with a friend or family member you trust, who can be supportive of you.
- There is a beginning and an end of the liminal space. Reminding ourselves that “this too shall pass,” may help you with your patience. Sometimes there can be comfort in knowing that you are in a liminal space that will transition you to something new; there is hope.
- Clarify what you can control and what you can’t. Accepting these differences is helpful, empowering us to move forward.
The family member I mentioned earlier applied all three of these ways to manage her experience in the liminal space. This helped her immensely.
If you find yourself stuck in a liminal space that you don’t see a way out, remember there is hope. Just as this past winter seemed unending, there is confidence that spring will eventually arrive if we give it enough time.